Daydreaming

B.C.

2010-07-09T21:03:00.001+08:00

To soar high

To be thrown way up in the sky

A certain feeling of flying

A moment of freedom

And then

Gravity conquers my heart

I fall way down

Into the unknown

A thud

My everything smack on the ground

Oh, my broken heart

Bleeding again

John Viktor

2008-04-29T18:39:00.002+08:00

You,
you are my most wonderful surprise,
my greatest demise.

I knew you well--
all the wonder in your eyes,
each finger, each limb,
and all that I could embrace,
touch, kiss.

And yet,
you are my favorite stranger.
Just a moment in time--
but a memory to last forever.

If you ever loved me,
never stop.
If you never loved me,
never start.

Don't ever leave.
Don't ever stay.

I don't want to ever see your face again,
yet your face is never to be forgotten.

I am yours forever and never.

Trance

2007-05-08T14:37:00.001+08:00

Entangled
in a never-ending web
of truths and lies,
of reality and make-believe,
where nothing makes sense.

Is this not a dream?
A moment of fantasy, perhaps?
'Tis when eyes wide open
but the senses deceive --
the skin welcoming an unknown touch,
the ears hear whispers, songs,
where there is nothing but silence.

Ay! Why you embrace me
in my fondest dreams,
as if you have been there
always,
as if desire embraced us
with so much longing?

And, whispered
how you have singled me out --
a lone lily in a vast lake.
How I was for you,
you alone.

Desire's madness engulfing --
I, no longer mine.
You are all my thoughts,
my being,
in truths and lies,
in reality and make-believe.

2007-02-13T14:40:00.000+08:00

If tomorrow death shall befall
My soul shall take pleasure in death
And open arms into the heavens

If tomorrow I shall live
My heart shall take joy in beating
Filled with the passion for living

If tomorrow I find myself alone
I shall take silence and make it gold
And let perfection bloom from soltitude

If tomorrow I find my one true love
I shall burn like fire
Flowing with love and life for the one

Thus I shall live for today
Dream of the future
And live in passion all my days

An ode to the one I love

2006-07-15T10:05:00.001+08:00

My Angel,
stay right here
in my heart
forever.
Don't wander
too far
much too long.
My soul thirsts,
calls to you --
it cannot wait
one minute.
My tired heart
awaits you
forever
and a day,
a day more.
You,
my all,
my ev'rything --
I am
nothing more
And
one day,
a promise --
you and I
together.
Nothing else
in the world
to keep us
far apart.
One true love,
magical,
unending,
eternal.

2006-05-24T15:55:00.000+08:00

The shrieking sounds of laughter, the crickets
pain and soothe my loneliness altogether.
The dim incandescent lights,
yellowing, hiding my sorrow in the night.
The warm, breath-like humid air
Encapsulating me,
my only friend.
All alone.
All hidden.
All drawn away from a bittersweet life,
a world that is my reality.

2006-05-24T15:50:00.000+08:00

Wishful,
I look at the world as I would a child --
hopeful, dreaming, ambitious.
I draw strength from a hidden fire --
exploding volcanoes,
sub-atomic particles.
I continue to dream fairytales,
I pursue a world which does not exist --
a wonderland,
a dream world.
I pretend to be strong,
to be invinscible --
I pretend but I am not.
And I am almost successful in all,
until I remember me,
until I feel,
until I ache.
Then I fall apart,
grow old,
die,
and be born once again.

Ode to a beautiful coward

2006-02-24T21:30:00.001+08:00

Oh, how wonderful you are,
knight from beyond!
You slay dragons with your sword,
but the lady you cannot save!
What an unfortunate irony you are.

Oh, what handsome lad you are,
a beautiful actor from the screen.
Success is something you most memorize,
but your heart you know not of.
When will you really fall in love?

Oh, beautiful! Man of my dreams!
You sweep me off my feet,
and I taste roses from your lips!
But where are you now?
Such a fool who never believed.

Oh, love! Bitter yet so sweet!
Angel of unfortunate pain,
and roses turn into daggers.
You are the other side of the coin,
the nightmare of my dreams.

If you should fly, be a kite.
Leave your strings behind,
be not a slave to your fears.
There is no other time than now,
and no other way than this.

2006-02-08T22:20:00.000+08:00

You are pure madness --
Folie pure;
Driving out sane from sanity.
You break me until I am nothing --
Je ne suis pas rien.
You are nothing but a dream,
Nothing but a lie --
Vous n'etes pas rien.

What am I to do?
Ce la m'est egal
Waiting or not waiting,
Knowing or not at all.
Ce n'est pas ma faute.
Though I am only making a fool of myself
Waiting for you --
But there is nothing.

You are each wall,
Each ceiling, and each floor,
And each door opens up to you --
chaque fenetre est votre sourire.
But you are but thin air,
An illusion --
Folie pure,
Neant pur.

2006-01-28T21:59:00.000+08:00

Learn the rhymes of my heart,
the measure to which no breadth or height compares,
words which speak nonsense.

Do not analyze,
do not try to comprehend --
love is not math: definite, precise.

Dream, instead;
float away in the raging madness,
a river who knows nothing but passion.

Be naked from reason
encapsulated in nothing but your senses;
unrated love, pure at earth's birth.

Allow me to be free,
love unjudged, in shades of gray;
existence in itself -- pure insanity.

2006-01-04T19:00:00.000+08:00

Enkindling your silent smile
In a vessel that is my mind
A vacuum of all that is wonderful in you
My senses gather
Each drop creating the wave
Unto which my world capsizes
Until nothing remains
But what I have gathered of your smile
Nothing but the light from your eyes

There are but yards of air between us
An eyeshot away from a kiss
But like a million miles
Like prison walls so high
I could not run to your side
My arms could not throw itself around you
My lips can do nothing but show a smile
My hand could only write a song of endearment
To the man that smiles at me from afar

Another moment I will cherish
A few seconds of your smile
Another warm feeling in my heart
A little memory stashed away in my mind
Some silent fire
I dare not quench
I fill my vessel to the brim
A little smile, a stare from your eyes
Is more than I can take

Paradox

2005-12-23T10:26:00.001+08:00

I love with all the love that is in me,
not from the heart
but from the blood that flows from it -
seeping throughout my body,
nourishing my life and my soul,
powering the mind and all senses in my system.

With each drop of red
a breath I breathe into the life of my love;
bittersweet juice that flows through my veins,
lone warmth to my body,
feelings through my nerves,
power to my life.

A love that comes not from the heart
but is powered by it
through that red that flows endlessly
until life cease to exist,
facilitated but not controlled by the mind,
the unseen reason behind the madness of this world.

And as I show this love,
I pierce through my skin into the heart,
blood gush forth to express itself,
ethereal pain ruling inside and out,
the passion that consumes me
until all life has poured out of my body.

But I shall live again -
quenched by the love, if you choose to
pour it out and let me drown in it;
let your love be the life in my body
and my love the life in you.
I shall live again eternal,
loving all the love that is you.

2005-12-22T11:11:00.000+08:00

Death!
Oh struggling breath!
Naked sighs,
Screaming chills
A never ending day
Morphing into
A never ending night.

Evil shrieks of laughter,
A sound from nowhere.
A fallen angel
Calls me to my grave.
A humdrum song
My mind could not digest -
Presence I could not contain.

Gloomy,
Such stubborn day -
Chilly winds,
Cloud-filled skies.
Tears turn to ice
And words frozen in time.
I close my eyes.

2005-12-13T23:10:00.000+08:00

Slowly losing my grip
My sanity hangs by a thread
Hormones in my blood poison my brain
Still not enough to kill me yet

As height become fearless falls
And silence become endless walls
I fight and struggle for my life
Take it not from myself

An endles rollercoaster ride
A forever turbulent sea
A hallway which has no door
A joy which I refuse to see

Blinded by the senseless pain in the world
From the darkness of the unknown
Lost in myself, devoid of light
Endlessly falling from life's flight

2005-12-09T22:51:00.000+08:00

Forget me not in your slumber tonight
Within the darkness of your home
Within your vivid imagination of the present unknown
In your dreams take me not out of your sight

Still encapsulated in the shadows of the past
Draw me near in your memory sweet
Keep frozen your heart until we again meet
In ardour unspoken that forever will last

Bittersweet life I have yet to face
Your arms in another's embrace
Tears have refused to drop for ages
Decades wait until we turn the page

Fly high and soar free
Love a little love away from me
As I love a little love away from you
Until we both find our destiny true

Star so bright in heaven's night
Carry off my prayers to his heart
Though now we live lives apart
My angel he still is, though out of sight

(I wrote this poem around the 1st quarter of year 2005)

2005-12-05T23:10:00.000+08:00

Light pouring forth from thy entirety
Owning my existence, my very purpose
Vaults forever locked with diaphanous beauty
Eternity encapsulated in thy warm breath

Indeed I, a willing slave ot thy lips
Song unsung for so long

Each and every waking hour
Time admits no faults
Earth has known no bounds to this passion
Rising melody that hearts eagerly await
No end is known of this hymn
Angelic existence, the harp and lyre of neverending ardor
Long to be heard, to be felt, to be realized

2005-12-04T22:07:00.000+08:00

Slumber

To slumber
To rest my body on feathery quilts
To cease my beating heart
To journey into the unknown, a dreamy beauty
To rest awhile from the maddening world
To realize insanity

To rest my heart from an emotional marathon
To cease awhile from loving in vain
To journey with him who loves me in dreams
To realize beauty
To dream reality
To be what I am, until tomorrow's morning comes

To slumber
To love and love again
To dream dreams
To realize reality
To be restful
To be at peace